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Dining Etiquette - General Etiquette Rules
Arrive at least 10 minutes early unless otherwise specified
Pass food from the left to the right
Dishes are removed from the right
Butter, spreads, or dips should be transferred from the serving dish to your plate before spreading or eating
Never turn a wine glass upside down to decline wine. It is more polite to let the wine be poured and not draw attention. Otherwise, hold your hand over the wine glass to signal that you don't want any wine.
Don't blow on your food to cool it off. If it is too hot to eat, take the hint and wait.
Keep elbows off the table.
Don't clean up spills with your own napkin and don't touch items that have dropped on the floor. You can use your napkin to protect yourself from spills. Then, simply and politely ask your server to clean up and to bring you a replacement for the soiled napkin or dirty utensil.
Do not blow your nose at the dinner table. Excuse yourself to visit the restroom. Wash your hands before returning to the dining room.
If you cough, cover your mouth with your napkin to stop the spread of germs and muffle the noise. If your cough becomes unmanageable, excuse yourself to visit the restroom. Wash your hands before returning to the dining room.
Turn off your cell phone or switch it to silent or vibrate mode before sitting down to eat, and leave it in your pocket or purse. It is impolite to answer a phone during dinner. If you must make or take a call, excuse yourself from the table and step outside of the restaurant.
Do not push your dishes away from you or stack them for the waiter when you are finished. Leave plates and glasses where they are.
Even the most obliging maitre d' is needlessly stressed by last-minute bookings. Try and get into the habit of giving your favourite restaurant plenty of notice when calling to book a table. When you make the call, introduce yourself, let them know that you've been to the restaurant several times, and find both the food and the service superb. You'd be surprised at how few people bother to do this. Everyone blossoms in the presence of a little praise - even a hardened maitre d' - so don't be afraid to offer some sincere and credible compliments.
Once you've established a sense of rapport over the phone, briefly explain the nature of the evening which you'd like the restaurant to host. Is it a birthday dinner, a surprise reunion, a meet-the-parents event? Let the maitre d' know something about the personal side of the evening, and how important it is that everything go smoothly.
Having set the scene, elicit his advice on the best place to sit. Too many patrons call and aggressively demand "the best table", only to find when they arrive they've been seated right next to the bathroom or a noisy kitchen. Involve the maitre d' in your situation, and he is much more likely to be willing to accommodate you.
Pass food from the left to the right
Be sure to say thank you to your server and bus boy after they have removed any used items
Set any passed item, whether it's the salt and pepper shakers, a bread basket, or a butter plate, directly on the table instead of passing hand-to-hand
Never intercept a pass
Snagging a roll out of the breadbasket or taking a shake of salt when it is en route to someone else is a no-no
Dishes are removed from the right
Butter, spreads, or dips should be transferred from the serving dish to your plate before spreading or eating
Never turn a wine glass upside down to decline wine. It is more polite to let the wine be poured and not draw attention. Otherwise, hold your hand over the wine glass to signal that you don't want any wine.
Don't blow on your food to cool it off. If it is too hot to eat, take the hint and wait.
Keep elbows off the table.
Don't clean up spills with your own napkin and don't touch items that have dropped on the floor. You can use your napkin to protect yourself from spills. Then, simply and politely ask your server to clean up and to bring you a replacement for the soiled napkin or dirty utensil.
Do not blow your nose at the dinner table. Excuse yourself to visit the restroom. Wash your hands before returning to the dining room.
If you cough, cover your mouth with your napkin to stop the spread of germs and muffle the noise. If your cough becomes unmanageable, excuse yourself to visit the restroom. Wash your hands before returning to the dining room.
Turn off your cell phone or switch it to silent or vibrate mode before sitting down to eat, and leave it in your pocket or purse. It is impolite to answer a phone during dinner. If you must make or take a call, excuse yourself from the table and step outside of the restaurant.
Do not push your dishes away from you or stack them for the waiter when you are finished. Leave plates and glasses where they are.
Even the most obliging maitre d' is needlessly stressed by last-minute bookings. Try and get into the habit of giving your favourite restaurant plenty of notice when calling to book a table. When you make the call, introduce yourself, let them know that you've been to the restaurant several times, and find both the food and the service superb. You'd be surprised at how few people bother to do this. Everyone blossoms in the presence of a little praise - even a hardened maitre d' - so don't be afraid to offer some sincere and credible compliments.
Once you've established a sense of rapport over the phone, briefly explain the nature of the evening which you'd like the restaurant to host. Is it a birthday dinner, a surprise reunion, a meet-the-parents event? Let the maitre d' know something about the personal side of the evening, and how important it is that everything go smoothly.
Having set the scene, elicit his advice on the best place to sit. Too many patrons call and aggressively demand "the best table", only to find when they arrive they've been seated right next to the bathroom or a noisy kitchen. Involve the maitre d' in your situation, and he is much more likely to be willing to accommodate you.
Dining Etiquette - On arrival
It is absolutely essential that you arrive looking like you are accustomed to receiving good service. If you know you're looking your best, you'll be more confident and outgoing. A polished appearance lets the staff know that you're a successful person who demands to be treated with respect. What you wear will, of course, depend on the formality of the restaurant and where you're going afterwards, but a good rule of thumb is to overdress rather than underdress.
Make sure that you greet the maitre d' warmly, introduce yourself, and remind him that you spoke to him on the phone about your requirements for the evening. Tell him again that you deliberately chose his restaurant as the venue for the evening because you've been here before, and were impressed with the quality of the food and the service.
Ask him if he managed to secure that table you talked about, and when he leads you towards the perfect table, be gracious and warm, but don't grovel. Remember that restaurant staff will only give you good service if they respect you, not if they feel sorry for you.Dining Etiquette - Napkin (In A Restaurant)
As soon as you are seated remove the napkin from your place setting, unfold it, and put it in your lap
Do not shake it open
At some very formal restaurants the waiter may do this for the diners, but it is not inappropriate to place your own napkin in your lap, even when this is the case
The napkin rests on the lap till the end of the meal
Don't wipe your face with the napkin
NEVER use it to wipe your nose!
If you excuse yourself from the table, loosely fold the napkin and place it to the left or right of your plate. Do not refold your napkin or wad it up on the table either. Never place your napkin on your chair.
At the end of the meal, leave the napkin semi-folded at the left side of the place setting. It should not be crumpled or twisted; nor should it be folded. The napkin must also not be left on the chair.
Do not shake it open
At some very formal restaurants the waiter may do this for the diners, but it is not inappropriate to place your own napkin in your lap, even when this is the case
The napkin rests on the lap till the end of the meal
Don't wipe your face with the napkin
NEVER use it to wipe your nose!
If you excuse yourself from the table, loosely fold the napkin and place it to the left or right of your plate. Do not refold your napkin or wad it up on the table either. Never place your napkin on your chair.
At the end of the meal, leave the napkin semi-folded at the left side of the place setting. It should not be crumpled or twisted; nor should it be folded. The napkin must also not be left on the chair.
Dining Etiquette - How & When To Eat
In a restaurant:
Here's the rule:
Eat to your left, drink to your right.
Any food dish to the left is yours, and any glass to the right is yours.
Start with the knife, fork, or spoon that is farthest from your plate and work your way in, using one utensil for each course.
The salad fork is on your outermost left, followed by your dinner fork.
Your soup spoon is on your outermost right, followed by your beverage spoon, salad knife and dinner knife.
Your dessert spoon and fork are above your plate or brought out with dessert.
If you remember the rule to work from the outside in, you'll be fine.
Once used, your utensils, including the handles, should not touch the table again.
Wait until all are served before beginning to eat.
Here's the rule:
Eat to your left, drink to your right.
Any food dish to the left is yours, and any glass to the right is yours.
Start with the knife, fork, or spoon that is farthest from your plate and work your way in, using one utensil for each course.
The salad fork is on your outermost left, followed by your dinner fork.
Your soup spoon is on your outermost right, followed by your beverage spoon, salad knife and dinner knife.
Your dessert spoon and fork are above your plate or brought out with dessert.
If you remember the rule to work from the outside in, you'll be fine.
Once used, your utensils, including the handles, should not touch the table again.
Always rest forks, knives, and spoons on the side of your plate or in the bowl.
For more formal dinners, from course to course, your tableware will be taken away and replaced as needed.
Condolence Notes
A condolence e-mail is not acceptable
You should take the time to send a card to show that you really care
If you are not very eloquent, choose a card with a beautiful message and sign it
Click here for more
You should take the time to send a card to show that you really care
If you are not very eloquent, choose a card with a beautiful message and sign it
Click here for more
Language/ Expressions
Don’t say “I’m sorry” for no reason; rather, say “excuse m
Considering mentioning the reason you are thanking somebody, by saying "Thank you for…"
Handling Waiters and Waitresses
Once you're seated at the table of your choice, you must be ready to deal with the next level of restaurant staff: the waiters and waitresses. Again, by far the most productive approach is to be warm and charming. When the waiter approaches, look him in the eye, smile and ask how he's doing. Listen to his recommendations, feel free to ask questions about the food or wine, and thank him for his help. Let him know if you had the veal last time and it was out of this world. Thank him every time he brings something to the table. Remember, waiters have a difficult job and deserve your respect and courtesy. If you're being polite and pleasant to serve, you also have a greater chance of resolving any potential complaints that may arise. Say you've ordered three dishes and there are only two on the table. If you ask your new friend the waiter if he would mind checking on where the third one is, it's highly likely you'll find it steaming on the table within about a minute, accompanied by a polite apology for the delay.
However, if you've spoken dismissively to the waiter and have barely made eye contact, any little mistakes or delays are certain to take much longer to straighten out. In this scenario, the waiter doesn't care about giving you good service, because you've treated him as your inferior.
However, if you've spoken dismissively to the waiter and have barely made eye contact, any little mistakes or delays are certain to take much longer to straighten out. In this scenario, the waiter doesn't care about giving you good service, because you've treated him as your inferior.
There's also an etiquette for leaving the restaurant. It goes without saying that a generous tip is essential. But make a point of thanking your waiter for the excellent service too. The phrase "send my compliments to the chef" is NOT a corny cliche, but an urbane way of making sure that everyone involved in your pleasant evening gets the thanks they deserve.
Naturally, you must also let the maitre d' know that you had a wonderful time, and acknowledge the part he played in the success of your evening. Tell him you'll be back soon for more of the wonderful food and service.If you make such a charming exit, it's highly likely that you'll be seated at the table of your choice and be given excellent service every time you visit this restaurant.
Opening Doors
Hold the door open for both men and women
Invitations
If an invitation says 'Regrets Only' you have to let the host know that you do not plan to attend
Toasts
You must not refuse to make a toast if asked to
However, you may keep it brief and simple
However, you may keep it brief and simple
Never toast with an empty glass; even a glass of water will do
Shaking Hands
Feel free to shake hands with anyone you’re introduced to; however, if you meet an older person, a dignitary or a woman, you should wait for them to extend their hand first
Sneeze and cough into your left hand, so that your right hand, which you use to shake hands, will be clean
Two men needn't remove their gloves to shake hands outdoors in hold weather
If extending your gloved hand to an ungloved person you can say "Excuse the glove"
When Meeting Someone for the First Time
Face them completely, not at an angle
Make eye contact with them
Smile
Say “Hi! I'm ...” (say your name clearly!)
Match the other person’s mood and tone of voice, if only for a sentence or two
If you are at a loss for words and have nothing to say, repeat the other person’s last few words – this will refuel the conversation and keep it going
When meeting new people, present only positive things about yourself
Lean Slightly Towards Them
Anything you say first, no matter how mundane, is fine, because it has very little to do with the other people’s perception of you.
When asked where you are from or what you do or when introducing people, give some more information in order to keep the conversation going
Don’t ask people what they do
Deliver news with appropriate sentiment
Stairs
A gentleman precedes a lady going up and down stairs
At a Party
Bring a small gift when visiting someone’s home
For a dinner party you can bring a flower bouquet or a bottle of wine
Travelling Abroad
When in Rome do as the Romans
When in a foreign country it pays to learn the basics of the culture in order to avoid offending people
Remember that you are a guest in that country
A useful and comprehensive site to start from is 'Executive Planet':
http://www.executiveplanet.com/index.php?title=Main_Page
When in a foreign country it pays to learn the basics of the culture in order to avoid offending people
Remember that you are a guest in that country
A useful and comprehensive site to start from is 'Executive Planet':
http://www.executiveplanet.com/index.php?title=Main_Page
Greetings and Introductions
When seeing someone you know (e.g. a colleague) from afar, aknowledge their presence e.g. by smiling, and when you approach at e.g. 5 feet, say "hello"
When you’re participating in a conversation and there’s someone you haven’t been introduced to, you can do so by saying “I don’t believe we’ve met; I’m …”
When introducing people, it’s nice to add some more information about them
Stand up when being introduced
Don't quiz people about their relation to the person they are accompanying - let them volunteer that information if they so desire
Invitations
When an invitation says “Regrets only” you have to let the host or hostess know that you do not plan to attend
If you’ve declined an invitation for a party and later learn you can attend, you may ask the host or hostess if you can do so
Do not discuss a invitation by someone with a mutual acquaintance - don't assume that everyone is invitedAnswering Inappropriate Questions
When you don’t want to answer an unwelcome question, repeat your initial negative response in the same tone as many times as it takes
...or say "Why do you ask?"
...or answer humorously and evasively
...or simply state that you do not wish to answer the question for such and such a reason
Theater/ Movies/ Opera
When stepping over peoples feet at e.g. the theatre, offer an occasional “excuse me” – but if you need to leave in the middle of the show, try to be as quiet as possible
Walking In Public Places
In the U.S. walk to the right on sidewalks
Always offer to share your umbrella
Always offer to share your umbrella
BUSINESS ETIQUETTE
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Job Interview Etiquette
When You Arrive:
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Arrive at least 15-30 minutes early to the job interview.
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Smile, shake hands, say please and thank you. Offer " I'm Pleased to meet you Bill" and "It's been nice to meet you" before and after the interview.
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Sit when invited to do so.
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Sit up straight.
When You Speak:
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Use the person's name at least once in the conversation. "Thank you Bill.. I received this tie for my birthday this year."
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Remember political correctness. Say nothing that could be objectionable to others.
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Speak clearly and concisely. Avoid slang.
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Do not wring your hands, rub your face, scratch, pick or fidget nervously.
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Make eye contact when speaking.
Business Attire
Socks must cover the calves (men)
How To Stir A Meeting
Plan your arguments well and anticipate the opponents’ objections.
Try to find win-win solutions.
Keep meetings rare and short.
Have a list of topics you want to go through
Save the most difficult topics for last
Never lose your temper.
Try to keep the participants as few as possible
Traits of a Good Employer
A good employer has a master plan in mind
Never be rude and never get angry at your employees
Never forget to praise your employees when they deserve it and always ask for their opinion
A boss should rise when meeting an assistant for the first time
He should introduce his assistant when they are both attending a meeting
He should come to an agreement with his assistant in the beginning on how they prefer to be addressed
How To Ask for a Pay Raise
If you don't ask for a pay raise you will never get one
Propose a figure so that you can negotiate
Always ask for a raise face-to-face
Do not give your boss any warning
Ask in the middle of the week and always during work hours
How to Behave at a Business Lunch
Be exactly 5 minutes early
If you see people you know when entering, just nod and smile and join your guests
Turn off your cell phone
If you arrive before your host, don’t take the best seat
If your guest has already ordered a drink, order one too
Don’t show dismay if your guest arrives late
If they are more than half an hour late and haven’t called, it’s probably safe to leave
Don’t announce that you’re on a diet
Don’t order anything that might cause a stain
If your guest drinks, buy a drink as well
You may order Coke
Never tuck your napkin into your collar
Lay the napkin on your lap as soon as you sit down
Always take important clients to fancy restaurants you know well, so you don’t have to wonder about the quality of the service
Don’t speak badly of the restaurant or the food
Do not send the food (or wine) back unless it’s inedible
The wineglass is held by the stem unless it is cold in which case you can cup the glass
Don’t slouch
Make a little small talk before launching into business discussion
Business Letters
"Best Regards" and "Regards", although somewhat informal, can be suitable closings in business letters if there is a degree of familiarity and first name basis
Leaving Your Job
Don’t apologize for leaving your job; unless you’ve signed a contract, you have every right to leave – but you can say “I’m sad to be leaving such wonderful people” etc.
When you leave your job it is wise not to burn bridges
Job Interviews
During the interview:
Maintain good eye contact
After the interview:
Write a 'Thank you' note
Maintain good eye contact
After the interview:
Write a 'Thank you' note
Offfice Etiquette
Always restock the copy machine with paper when you've used it all up
If you are going to be more than 5 minutes late for an appointment call ahead
If you are going to be more than 5 minutes late for an appointment call ahead
Interviewing Job Candidates
When interviewing someone, the most important follow-up question is “why”?
Business Cards
Have current business cards
Use a card caseE-mail Etiquette
Don't use your business e-mail address for personal messages
Salutations and closings are not technically required with e-mail
Answer e-mails promptly
Don't use all capitals
Always proofread your e-mail
Do not forward chain letters
Don’t use abbreviations
Never send angry e-mails - you will regret it later
Use the signature feature
Don’t give out someone’s e-mail address without permission
Phone Etiquette
When speaking to someone for the first time on the phone, instead of saying “It was nice meeting you”, say “It was a pleasure speaking with you”.
When on speaker phone let your caller know who else is in the room
Return all phone calls the same day and e-mails within a day
